Essay by Don Neske. As we celebrate another Memorial Day, it’s a great time to reflect back on our past history, the present sacrifices being made by a few for so many, and discover some meaning behind a holiday that has come to represent the beginning of summer.

Having grown up in North Jersey in a family with World War Two veterans, my earliest memories of Memorial Day were steeped in traditional observances and celebration.

My father, Donald Neske Sr., served in WWII and was an active member of the Ramsay VFW. Some of the most special moments of my life were spent in the early hours on Memorial Day accompanying the VFW Honor Guard in the local cemetery as they performed their services of remembrance, including a 21 gun salute. I vividly remember collecting the shell casings, a big deal for a young boy, and I’d bet I could still find a few of those if I dug through my time capsules.

Later, the town would hold a parade, a huge party replete with a BBQ for everyone in the town! That was really something! I lived in Midland Park, a much smaller town a few miles down the road, and we had nothing like it.

Later on, I joined the Midland Park scouts. (Here’s a shout out to you, Troop 157!) I remember marching in our own Memorial Day parade. For Midland Park in the 1970s, the Memorial Day parade was very personal. We lost a lot of good young men in the Viet Nam War, the second highest losses per capita in the nation. Emotions and pride ran very high for us.

In particular, I remember my sweetest teacher ever, Mrs. Wedlake, who lost her son Brian to that war. She always seemed to understand me and treat me so kindly, when so few others did. And all during a time when her heart was breaking. This Memorial Day, my thoughts and prayers are with her and her son, Brian Francis Wedlake, who died at the age of 19 in 1968. Thank you both!

Sad to say, but I’m not even sure they celebrate Memorial Day anymore in Midland Park. Most of us old timers have moved away. I checked the borough’s calendar and website, but could find no mention of a parade. If you’re living in MP and read this, let me know.

This Memorial Day, I’m also thinking of my dad and his brother, my Uncle Bud Neske, who both served in Europe in WWII. My uncle saw combat, and had his unit overrun during the Battle of the Bulge. As the story was related to me, he was sheltered in the crawl space in the home of a Belgian family, in order to avoid capture.

I have nothing but the fondest memories of my Uncle Bud! He too was an active member of the Ramsay VFW, and he always took the time to play with me when I was young. I was a very high octane kid, more than my parents could handle, but I remember my uncle always had patience for me. The VFW used to have some awesome clambakes to raise money, and I vividly remember my Uncle Bud spinning me by my arms like a helicopter.

Sadly, he was taken too soon from us by cancer. This Memorial Day, I plan on remembering my uncle in my prayers and actions! I’m going to have a little more patience with my own kids and give each one of them a helicopter spin, telling them of my favorite uncle, Uncle Bud!

I’m going to remember my dad too! We didn’t always see eye to eye when I was a kid, but I could always count on him when it mattered. I learned how to be a father from my relationship with him. In the end, we achieved a mutual respect that we couldn’t enjoy long enough. He passed away before he could meet his grandson, but I’ll make sure my kids know him and don’t forget him.

And finally, I’ll be thinking about and praying for all the fine young men and women who are serving in our military today! I’ll be thinking about my good friend Casey Schwarz who is in the Navy and stationed in Texas, and who just won a hard earned promotion. (Congratulations!)

I’ll be thinking about how so many young persons are in harms way, fighting an enemy who seems so remote that most of us rarely think of them anymore. I’ll be praying for the swift completion of their mission and their safe return. I’ll be praying for those who have lost their lives and those who have been wounded.

I’ll be giving thanks to all of these good and brave Americans, and I’ll be praying that I, my family, and my fellow countrymen, living here in peace at home, will live our lives in a way that earns the sacrifices these people are making for us. We have a long way to go before we can honor them in this way, but we can start this Memorial Day.