Join the adventures of Gerry Barnes and friends! In this final installment, Gerry shares his favorite destinations of this summer's Trek.

Gerry’s Top 10 Highlights of the Great Western Trek of 2008

- By Gerry Barnes

Because so much was accomplished and so much fun was compacted into our too-short idyll, it seems a bit prosaic to merely list who did what when and where. Instead, I have opted to list – in ascending order - the Top 10 Highlights of the Great Western Trek of 2008. Here are my favorite destinations on the Great Western Trek of 2008.

To anyone seeking unlimited enjoyment on a limited budget, these are the can’t miss places to visit.

#1 Yosemite National Park & Moaning Cavern

After endless debate and a litany of inner arguments pro and con, I finally decided that it was impossible to pick THE top highlight of this year’s excursion. Two places kept battling it out in my mind for the title, and in the end, I had to concede that it was a clear tie. Both experiences were worthy of being labeled Number One.

Yosemite National Park has been a place close to my heart ever since I first encountered it as a child watching The Caine Mutiny on the late show on TV. Of course, they don’t throw a fall of burning embers over the side of a mountain anymore (pity), but the place remains much the same as it did in the 1954 film. I first came here as a USC student in a trip sponsored by USC’s Adventure Club and helmed by its director, wilderness resource coordinator Dave Wyman. Twenty-six years later, I returned for another trip helmed by – who else? – the same Dave Wyman. I can think of no better guide.

Dave is something of a natural wonder himself. A professional photographer with several highly regarded books and dozens of magazine photos to his name, he also teaches at UCLA, runs trips and workshops for the LA Zoo, for the Los Angeles and San Diego Natural History Museums, and on behalf of the Yosemite Association. He also offers inexpensive tours and workshops in and around California for his own Image Quest organization. (Contact: davewyman@mountainman.com or call 323-377-7565).

Our Family Camping Jamboree was being sponsored by the Yosemite Association (Yosemite Outdoor Adventures) in the beautiful Tuolumne Meadows. The cost for four days’ worth of camping fees, three meals a day (with clean-up provided) and numerous guided tours came to only $247 (with a $35 Yosemite Association membership). For father-and-son, the cost was just $353 (with a $40 Family membership). Who said that bargains were a thing of the past? (For further info, call 209-379-2321). Indeed, the 315-mile/5 ½ hour drive to Yosemite proved very easy on both bottoms and wallets.

It’s hard to say what I liked best about Yosemite. It was a real toss-up between the wonderful people on the camping trip and the wonderful places we saw. Climbing Pothole Dome and Lembert Dome, panning for gold on the Tuolumne River (this was a hands-down favorite of Miles and Nathan. They combined forces with a terrific kid their own age named Kenzo – and the three of them labored hours to fill a water bottle with dozens of gold flakes – which Mark then absentmindedly drank for dinner), swimming at Tenaya Lake, visiting Parsons Lodge, drinking from the natural spring at Soda Springs (the water tasted like a cross between Mountain Dew and rusty old nails but it instantly cured my upset stomach), fishing in the River (Nathan caught a rainbow trout but only brown trout are for keeps at Yosemite; everything else is catch-and-release) or just sitting around the campfire at night, toasting marshmallows and making s’mores while watching Dave’s slides or listening as Nathan played Peter Frampton numbers on his guitar – it was all great. My personal favorites, though, were definitely the trip to the Cascades – dozens of little waterfalls, tidepools and eddys that are just breathtakingly lovely – and the shady hike around the emerald-colored Lake Tenaya.

Undoubtedly, it was a trip to remember. And a wonderful precursor to our final adventure.

Moaning Cavern.

What can I say about Moaning Cavern except that, if you have only one vacation day a year to spend, spend it here!

A cross between an amusement park and a Navy Seal training course, this place is like nothing you’ve ever seen. (Just google “Moaning Cavern, California” and see what I mean!) Kid-friendly, parent-friendly, there’s something for everyone here. Of course, my editor, knowing of my natural aversion to heights, insisted that I experience the zip lines, the 160-foot rappel, and the 1½-hour cave crawl.

We had actually avoided the zip lines in Lake Tahoe. Although they are longer, they are also more prone to breaking down in high winds - and because of the great Tahoe crowds, they required that we make reservations three days in advance. Not at all feasible for someone who was in town for just a few days. The zip lines at Moaning Cavern were far more accommodating, and as it turned out, every bit as much fun.

Not that crossing a 60-foot long sky bridge, being strapped into a harness, stepping off a platform high up in mid-air, then hurtling over treetops along a 1500-foot wire was exactly what I’d bargained for. I’m not an adrenaline junkie. But when I saw a five year old and his mother strapped in next to me for a tandem zip, I didn’t have much room to back down. And I’m glad of it. The ride was thrilling and although that first step is a big one, once airborne, the ride is surprisingly smooth. At $39 per shot, it was well worth the experience.

But the real rush came with the ($76) rappel. Moaning Cavern is California’s largest public cave chamber – so big, in fact, that it can hold the entire Statue of Liberty. Imagine climbing down the Statue of Liberty on a rope and you’ll have a fair idea of what it’s like to rappel down Moaning Cavern. Gloves, hardhat with lantern, and all rappelling equipment were provided and detailed instructions were given before the great push off. Luckily, we followed behind a group of girl scouts whose singing voices proved a real tonic for my terror. The first 20 or 30 feet were no problem. It wasn’t until I stepped out on a tiny ledge and looked way, way, way down to the cavern floor, where people milled around like tiny ants on a sand hill, that the breath went out of me. It’s astonishing: this rappel has been done by wizened 94 year olds and by 12 year olds the size of peanuts. But a brawny ex-marine in our party couldn’t handle it and he ended up taking the stairs down. I followed Nathan and, although we both had our hearts in our throats, we made it safe-and-sound to the bottom. (Everybody does. Moaning Cavern hasn’t lost a client yet.) Mark’s climb down proved even more interesting: the electricity blew out for about 20 minutes and he went down in the dark! (He loved it.)

But this was still just a preliminary to the cave crawl. This was certainly my favorite part of the experience. ($130 for both rappel and cave tour) Ever since my childhood trip to the Keswick movie theatre where I saw James Mason, Pat Boone and that big blonde guy from Iceland descending into the bowels of the planet in Journey to the Center of the Earth, I’d wanted to do some serious spelunking and here, at last, was my opportunity. Our guide, Brandon, was just superb. He deftly led us through an underground maze of tunnels and chutes and crawlspaces that twisted and turned and narrowed and widened as we crawled on our bellies, propelled ourselves between razor-thin ledges on our backs, grappled for footholds on rocks that were as slippery as ice, and reached deep within ourselves for the strength to keep on moving. It was dark and dirty and hot and fantastic! Somewhere along the way, our ex-marine friend got a touch of claustrophobia and took the escape rope out. I exited the cave at its end by climbing directly up a chute (with a helping hand from Nathan, who was a real trooper throughout) that looked like a chimney. I was sweaty and filthy and unbelievably happy. This is an experience one never forgets!

It was also a perfect way to end our Great Western Trek of 2008.

Moaning Cavern: 5350 Moaning Cavern Road, Vallecito, CA 95251 209-736-2708

In looking back from a week’s distance, what impresses me most about this year’s adventure was just how right everything went – even when they went wrong. Such vacations are rare – even with a detailed itinerary. So many little things added up to our having one incredible experience: the trip north, where we got in touch with our younger selves by blasting CD’s by Journey, Foreigner, Grateful Dead, Doobie Brothers, etc., over the car radio; the fresh smell of sage in the mountain air; the sight of a baby bear shimmying up a pine tree; the drive through beautiful Stanislaus National Forest with all its treacherously high, hairpin turns (which I actually hated) and my first look at stunning Lake Alpine; careening around an 8000 foot high mountain curve to find two cows standing in the middle of the road; even our stay in the Motel 8 in South Lake Tahoe (3 nights for only $256.80 – and close to everything!) where we ate the worst hot wings in the world as we watched some trashy horror movie wherein Paris Hilton got turned into a wax dummy (I couldn’t tell the difference.)

It was all good!

Travel can be more addicting than narcotics, and when one shares the addiction with good friends, well, nothing in the world is more satisfying. Keep this jolly little thought in mind until next time, when Yours Truly ventures forth on some other economy-priced misadventure. And until then – (as they say at Bahooka) – Yacka Hula Hickey Dula!!!!